Every now and then I wonder how much easier would things be if I was a more normal "girl". Maybe I'm a mild feminist who believes that ladies shouldn't be treated as the more inferior being despite the fact that we are. I love the fact that I am independent and am perfectly fine with being alone. Yet there are times when I really hope I can be more "gu niang"; to allow myself to rely on people more, to be a little more needy, to whine and get the things I want, to like romantic gestures, to not have to be strong all the time, to love the "cute" things, to express care naturally, to want to talk more, to desire to articulate my feelings and to want to know that I'm loved all the time. Yet currently, those are the things that I dislike, things that I can't even get myself to do. I won't try them because I don't want to. I just genuinely hope that I can be loved for who I am. 

In deep need for normalcy. 

Need to look beyond the shell.